two7zero3

Sunday, August 06, 2006

dun really know what to say. sometimes it sucks to be me. so much stuffs stored within. nowhere to let it go. its self destructive. maybe one day i'll crack. not yet. pretty ironic isn't it. i'm always asking for ppl to have confidence. courage.
yet i'm afraid of writing down everything. blogs aren't diaries. and i dun trust diaries. life isn't that simple i guess. i look at myself and think. what a hypocrite. i can't practice what i preach. i can't take criticism. i'm arrogant. selfish.quick to anger. weaknesses line me. imbued.
shatterpoints.
i guess i'm not worthy.
theres a voice there whispering you're thinking too much
i wonder if thats me. dun really know. lost.
why does this always happen when i sit down to think.
maybe thats why i like sch. keeps me busy. keeps my mind from idling.
its funny how i always say i hate sch. i hate the lessons. tutorials. lectures. homework.practicals. but i wonder if i'll be able to live without them.
its funny how life works. cycles.
over and over and over again.
guess this'll be another one of those posts. that i juz try to find my way out from.
fell over. i'll stand up again. but stand up the same. i dun think so.
my chinese teacher kinda said this. if a kite's string is cut. u won't get i back again. a classmate said it might. she then said. but it'll nvr be in the same place as when it begun.
lost.
wonder if i answered differently . what would have happened. i already knew what was happening before it did.so i chose.
wonder what it would be like.
i once told someone.
the darker it gets. the brighter ur stars will shine.
i know that mine will.
just need that bit of reassurance.
Twenty four oceans
Twenty four skies
Twenty four failures
Twenty four tries
Twenty four finds me
In twenty-fourth place
Twenty four drop outs
At the end of the day
Life is not what I thought it was
Twenty four hours ago


ticktick # 3:45 PM